GOON CANDY | CH. 4

GOON CANDY

A Shamar Phillips Story

Chapter Four

"A MOTHER'S INSTINCT"

        “Are we calling this in to the special victims unit now? Or is this another case of mom abusing drugs while in an abusive relationship?”

        “It’s definitely a special victims case. But I wanna talk to her before I call anyone. She was my son’s girlfriend.”

        “Your son did this?”

        “No! My son didn’t have anything to do with this. Candy left for school a year ago and randomly disappeared. Last night was the first night he’s seen her since.”

        After a week of going back and forth with Dr. Garcia about reporting Candy’s case, Vanness realized she had to watch what she said in front of him. He had gone to her office every day since Candy had gotten to the hospital, bickering about their next steps. It was as if he wanted something bad to happen just so he could use the situation to bring a spark back to his career.

        Although Vanness was the one in charge, she had to trust that her staff had their own minds and would follow protocol the way she had taught them to. But the last thing she wanted was for Goon to become a suspect in something he had nothing to do with, which was why she wanted to wait until Candy could speak for herself before she made any decisions.

        “What about the baby?” Garcia asked. “She has drugs in her system and will mostly start going through withdrawals. We’re supposed to call that in to CPS. We’re lucky we removed her when we did. Otherwise she could have died.”

        “I know, Garcia. Believe me, I do. But as Black women, we don't get the same treatment as everyone else when it comes to the system and our children. I just don’t wanna get them involved, and they take the baby because they think she’s abusing drugs.”

        “It’s what it looks like.”

        It took everything in Vanness’s power not to tell Garcia to shut the fuck up. He was a great doctor who cared about his patients, but the animosity he felt because of her achievements was unbearable at times.

        “Look, I know Candy. She’s not a drug user, and she’s not a prostitute, or whatever else you think she is. She’s a good girl. A hard-working girl. She got into NYU for fucks sake. She’s my patient, and this is my call. Now please, I’m done with this.”

        Garcia’s jaw clenched like he wanted to push back, but he was already on thin ice with Vanness. She was the only one who had given him a shot after he fucked up at his previous hospital, and although it killed him to be stationed under a woman’s thumb, he remembered to tread lightly.

        “Fine. It’s your call.” He stood up from the seat at her desk and headed for the door. “But for the sake of that baby, I hope you’re right.”

        He closed the door behind him a little harder than Vanness was pleased with, but for the sake of buying Candy some time, she let him walk away with a warning.

        Her concerns about Goon were most important to her at the time. She knew he was on the verge of doing something crazy, so reeling him in before it got to that point had her focus.

        Thanks to her late husband, she had a few friends in law enforcement who were of good use. She was able to make some calls and have her connections fish for information from New York. Since Candy was placed in a medically induced coma after an emergency C-section and surgery, she wasn’t able to provide any insight about what happened to her.

        After her calls were made, Vanness went to Candy’s room to check on her. It hurt to see her laid up with all kinds of tubes sticking out of her arms and bandages scattered all over her body. The girl she last saw was vibrant and full of life, eager to set out into the world and make something of herself. But the girl who was rushed in the night before was someone she didn’t know at all. Someone she wasn’t even sure would pull through.

        “You gotta fight your way out of this, Candy girl.” Vanness took a seat at her bedside and gently rubbed her head. “Nolan is waiting on you. Your baby girl too. They both need you more than you know.”

        Candy’s eyes fluttered, but she didn’t wake up. Vanness knew she had heard her, though. Her breathing grew rapid, as if she wanted to wake up, but the medicine was just too powerful.

        “I know you can hear me,” Vanness smiled. “I’m right here with you. We're gonna get through this and get you back to living the life you were after. One day at a time.”

        She sat with Candy until it was time to move on to her next patient. And even between her rounds and check-ins, she continued to go back to Candy’s room to check on her. Before she went home after an almost three-day shift, she went down to the NICU to check on Candy’s baby.

        The baby didn’t have a name yet because Candy couldn’t give her one. But she was so precious, with a head full of hair and chubby cheeks.

        Even though she had a rough entrance into the world, the little one was a fighter. Her heartbeat was strong, and she was more alert than a lot of adults Vanness had come across. It was a miracle that after what her mother had suffered, she was still alive.

        “This one is doing alright, I see.” A NICU nurse came in for her midnight feeding and caught Vanness gazing. “How’s mom?”

        “Hoping for the best,” Vanness replied. “Has anyone taken the baby up to see her?”

        “No. Not yet. Do you think it could help?”

        “Maybe,” Vanness shrugged. “Maybe if she smells the baby or, I don’t know, feels her presence, it’ll give her strength to keep fighting.”

        After her husband died, Vanness lost her faith in a lot. She used to go to church in her free time. She prayed, she meditated; she did a lot of things that were spiritually and religiously aligned, but when he lost his fight with cancer, her beliefs drifted away.

        She still prayed for Goon every night. He was the only person she had left in the world, and if anything happened to him, she didn’t think she could go on.

        It broke her heart to think of Candy slipping away before she got the chance to hold her baby. It hurt her even more to think about how Goon would respond if she did. So, even though she was exhausted and needed a hot shower and a cold glass of wine, she decided that rest could wait.

        “I’m gonna take her up to Mom,” she said. “I’ll do her feed while we’re there, so that’ll be one less feeding on your hands tonight.”

        “You sure? You’ve been on the clock over 24 hours.”

        Vanness nodded, “Yeah. It’s not a problem. I know Mom personally.”

        She gathered the baby, an extra diaper, and her milk pouch and headed back to Candy’s room. When she got off the elevator, the floor was busy with staff. Normally, after midnight, the floor was slow, quiet, and empty. All except nurses and aides doing their rounds. That night, however, there was chaos.

        “What’s going on?” She stopped a rushing nurse in passing.

        “The patient in room 217 is losing her mind. She hit a nurse and is threatening to kill everyone.”

        The nurse sped off, and Vanness was right behind her. When she got to Candy’s room and saw her standing upright in bed, swinging the pole from her IV drip at anyone who got too close, she knew Dr. Garcia was going to have a field day.

        “Ms. Ashford, I’m Dr. Garcia. Can you calm down so we can fill you in on why you’re here?”

        “Where’s Dr. Carter!?” she shouted. “I wanna see her, now!”

        “We can get Dr. Carter for you, but you have to calm down first. You endured a lot of trauma, and too much vigorous movement could cause a lot more damage.”

        Gargia sprinkled his words carefully, making sure not to sound too stern or fed up with Candy’s outburst. His hands were in the air like he was pleading, but Candy wasn’t hearing it.

        “Fuck you! I wanna talk to Dr. Carter, right now, or I swear to God!”

        “I’m here!” Vanness spoke over the commotion. “Candy, I’m here. Everyone, out. I’ll take it from here.”

        “Excuse me?” Garcia frowned. “She needs to speak with police right now, while she’s alert.”

        “Garcia, don't challenge me,” Vanness said. “She’s already been through enough. She’s my patient, and it’s her right to speak with me in private. Now, please, leave. All of you.”

        Garcia glared at Vanness, then at the baby. His nostrils flared like a bull's, and his brows lowered like a hood over his eyes. Vanness didn’t care about his attitude or about him making a report on his own. All she cared about in that moment was finding out what happened to Candy.

        “Candy girl, what happened? How did you end up like this?”

        Vanness nearly cried as she spoke. She thought Candy was going to have a hard fight to get back to her old self, but she was full of relief to see her kicking and screaming.

        “Is that it? Is that the baby?” Candy looked at the bundle in Vanness’s arms with pure disgust. “Get it away from me! I don’t wanna see it!”

        She dropped down on the bed and shut her eyes tightly. Her knees were to her chest, and she rocked back and forth like a patient confined to a padded cell. She was frantic—adamant about not wanting anything to do with her child. It was a wild take for Vanness to wrap her head around, but when she thought about what Candy had possibly gone through, the reality started to shift.

        “Candy, what are you saying? You don’t wanna see your daughter?”

        “No! That’s not my daughter!” Candy snapped. “That baby is nothing to me!”

        Tears stung Vanness’s eyes as the truth to her assumptions settled in. Candy was a victim of what only God knew. Her anger said all there was to say. The only things left to do were to figure out who did it and what to do with the baby.

        “Where’s Nolan?” Candy asked. “Does he know I’m here?”

        “He’s the one who brought you here.”

        Candy looked up, her eyes softer than they were in the beginning. She glanced at the baby in Vanness’s arms from across the room, then quickly looked away again.

        “Can you tell me what happened?” Vanness asked softly. “I’ve been holding off a report because I didn’t wanna get child protective services involved until you were awake. But now that you are…”

        She looked at the baby, sad that Candy didn’t want her. As badly as she wanted her to take a look, or even hold her hand to see if she felt something, Vanness kept her distance so the baby wouldn't feed too much on the negative energy.

        “Call them,” Candy spat. “I don’t care what happens to that baby. I don’t want it. They can take it and do whatever they want with it. It’s not mine. I don't ever wanna see her!”

        There was venom in her voice but tears in her eyes that she could no longer hold. She buried her face against her knees and cried, asking God why he let bad things happen to her. She was a good girl. She tried hard to live a decent life and make good decisions. Yet and still, she ended up enduring a year of pain that she wouldn’t have wished on her worst enemy.

        “Why me? Why?” Candy pleaded for answers. “Why did this have to happen to me? I don't bother anyone. I work. I go to school. I don't sleep around or run the streets. Why?”

        Vanness’s heart crashed so hard that she ignored what Candy had said about the baby and rushed to her side to hug her.

        “I know you’re angry right now, Candy girl, but you can’t take it out on the baby. You take as much time as you need to get through this. I’ll make sure she’s alright. In the meantime, I gotta make that call to SVU so we can start trying to find the person who hurt you.”

        Candy shook her head as the tears continued to fall. She held onto Vanness for as long as she needed to, and had even taken a good look at the baby. She was still angry and conflicted about the life of her child, but she hoped that as time passed, she could get over it.